Let us not forget...

A SOLDIER'S CHRISTMAS

'Twas the night before Christmas, he lived all alone,in a one bedroom house made of plaster and stone.

I had come down the chimney with presents to give,and to see just who in this little house lived.

As I looked all about, a strange sight I did see,No tinsel, no presents, not even a tree.

No Stockings by mantle, just boots filled with sand,On the wall hung pictures of far distant lands.

With medals and badges, awards of all kinds,A sobering thought came through my mind.

For this house was different, it was dark and dreary, The home of a soldier, I could now see clearly.

The soldier lay sleeping, silent, alone,Curled up on the floor in this one bedroom home.

The face was so gentle, the room in such disorder,Not how I picture a United States Soldier.

Was this the hero of whom I'd just read?Curled up on a poncho, the floor for a bed?

I realized the families that I saw this night,owed their lives to these soldiers who were willing to fight.

Soon round the world, the children would play,and grownups would celebrate a bright Christmas day.

They all enjoyed freedom each month of the year,because of the soldiers, like the one lying here.

I couldn't help wondering how many lay alone,on a cold Christmas Eve in a land far from home.

The very thought brought a tear to my eye,I dropped to one knee and started to cry.

The soldier awakened and I heard a rough voice,"Santa don't cry, for this life is my choice".

I fight for freedom, I don't ask for more,My life is my God, my country, my corps."

The soldier rolled over and drifted to sleep,I couldn't control it, I continued to weep.

I kept watch for hours, so silent and still,as we both shivered from the cold night's chill.

I didn't want to leave, on that cold, dark night,this guardian of honor, so willing to fight.

Then the soldier rolled over, with a voice soft and pure,whispered, "Carry on Santa...., It's Christmas Day...., All is secure.

One look at my watch, and I knew he was right,Merry Christmas my friend.... and to all a Good Night.

~ Author Unknown *~

On life and death...

Dr. Neal Van Ness passed away this week. I am very sad to hear this news. He was my surgeon, he performed three surgeries on me. He was a good man. I had to be one of his most stubborn and contrary patients. He always used lots of patience and understanding with me and I know it was a challenge at times. He put up with the little hissy fits I would have in the hospital and would ultimately direct the staff to let me have my way, but keep me from hurting myself. :)

He would take the time to explain in great detail what was going on and why I was feeling so horrible. Which would lead to me getting dizzy and passing out in his office. It came to a point where they would have a fan, cold wet wash cloth and smelling salts set up for me....finally the day came when he was able to explain it all to me and I didn't pass out and it was a cause for celebration!!!

I think when we discovered I had a triple hernia shortly after my colon resection surgery he was even more upset than I was. he just felt terrible for me and it felt good to have someone like that care. When I had complications afterward and we couldn't figure out what it was, he was straight up honest with me and told me he didn't know what it was, but he would help me find out.

I have had problems recently and called in and found out he was on medical leave. I was sad to hear that and now even sadder. Our community has suffered a great loss in both a surgeon and person.

I have heard so many other sad stories lately also of friends and acquaintances battling with cancer and other illness. There is never a good time for any of this but the holiday season just makes it so much more difficult. My thoughts and prayers are with all of these people as they fight their own personal battles that many of us will never know or understand.

My dear friend Dan wrote on his blog yesterday of a friend of his who took his own life. These are such desperate times for many of us it is so easy to lose faith but faith is exactly what we need the most. Dan shared this man left behind his wife and two young daughters. The despair and pain this family is left with is devastating and breaks my heart in a million pieces. How do you help? What can you say? What can you do? Just wrap them in love in prayers....

And this is where I start digging deep. Digging deep into my own faith and what I believe. I was raised in a home that knows God's love, but was taught religion is from within, its not in the church you attend and how often you attend, it is in the person you are and the life you live. I went to a Catholic high school and was drawn to the Catholic faith and converted in my mid 20s. Shortly after things in my life happened that made me question that choice and fall away from the Catholic church.

A good friend of our family, a good man in life, took his own life. He took it out of despair over recent health developments and facing becoming an invalid and a burden on his family. He was a proud man and unable to accept total dependency on someone else for the very basic needs of his life. I was devastated. And I was more devastated to think that God would banish him to the confines of hell for eternity. I had to believe our God is more just than that and he looks at the picture as a whole, looks at the life the person has led and not one act of total despair... I choose to believe we have a God who will think outside of the box, look at the gray matter and not respond and react in black and white only?