Parenthood

When it rains it pours.

I have had a particularly difficult summer with the kids. Not horrible. Just difficult.

Most of it is typical kid stuff and not as bad as a lot of things some parents have to deal with.

Nevertheless, what I have had to take on this summer has been just a tad much.

I am not sleeping very much. I find myself awake to 3 and 4 in the morning most mornings and basically running on empty.

It always seems like when one kid is in trouble, another one goes out of their way to be an absolute angel.

The summer started with my daughter and I going at it over most everything and me catching her doing one wrong thing after another. I think it is possible I am more strict with her than the boys. One because she is a girl. And two because her dad has turned his back on her although he continues to see the boys. I am very afraid for her and want her life to be good and it is hard to let go and let her make her own decisions, good or bad. (no one ever told me parenting would hurt so much.)

As I continued to catch my daughter up to one thing after another, my oldest son turned into this shining star of a young man. My pride in him was evident to all. (I am very proud of all three of my kids, they truly are all good kids...) It just seems as though my oldest son has turned into this grown up over night, and he did happen to hit the 6'1" mark too along with a cracking deep voice almost overnight.

Then suddenly some scary situations arose with my youngest son while in his dad's care. And as I addressed and am addressing those incidents, the light started to shine upon my oldest son's indiscretions. And now, of course, my daughter is behaving beautifully and has her halo back in place over her head (don't worry, I see the horns that are holding it in place.)

I honestly can't wait for school to start in two weeks, I am hoping getting back into a routine, and getting everyone home more often on a regular schedule will put some normalcy back into all of our lives. Before I lose my mind and collapse from exhaustion.